Book 0: The Prequel
|
Though it's an "origin story" of sorts, this wasn't made first, book 1 was made first. If I remember correctly, this was made between Book 7-Train Trouble, and Book 8-Bridge at Berlin. Anyway, it begins with an attempt at an "epic intro", introducing World War 1 as "the war to end all wars" and then World War 2 as "the great war"... actually another name for the first one. Then it introduces World War 3 as the "Stealth war". One of the large flying "Queens" lands near a cliff in a desert, dropping off one very strange-looking mech, with Steve Gunn driving it. He says "Private Gunn has left the queen"; an introduction to some of the extremely cheesy dialogue in this comic. The strange design of the mech is because it's based on / a callback to the origins of The Gun, when I'd march up the garden path, crouched down, shooting at set-up toy soldiers and "gun turrets" (Still Tango bottles) with a water pistol. |
|
||
|
At the "Emny Defence", one of the enemy soldiers screams "What the hell is that?", before being blown away (these mechs were armed with "rapid fire grenade launchers"). Someone else shoots the mech from behind, with a rocket launcher. Gunn escapes in some kind of escape pod just as it explodes. Once out of that, he sets his gun to Silent (he doesn't have 'The Gun' yet, just the Ripper machine gun, which has 3 settings, slow fire, rapid fire and silent, the latter just somehow changes the bullets to fire silently, even though the gun only has one magazine and one barrel) and blows away an enemy soldier. The guy getting shot says the first "Urg" in the chronological history of the strip. This is a sound made by many people when they die, my friends at school used to take the piss out of it. Gunn grabs the dead soldier's radio and reports in that "The emny is dead", with triangular brackets to show he is speaking the language of... whatever this place is. The commander in the hidden base Gunn was attacking (apparently on his own!) opens a hatch and reveals there is a nuclear missile inside...dun dun dunnn! As the sun sets Gunn reports that the battle is lost, but they need reinforcements to continue attacking the missile base. Dunno why they couldn't have just sent a whole army in the first place, but there ya go. By nightfall, the reinforcements arrive and sneak up to the base. They spot an automated sentry gun, just like the ones out of the director's cut of Aliens. How do they bypass this advanced defence system? They sneak up behind it and cut the wire between the camera and the gun... defeated by a pair of £3 Wilko's wire cutters! Then they chuck ropes down into the missile launching base and slide down inside to attack, a copy of the scene where ninjas attack the 'volcano' rocket base in some Bond film (I forget which one). |
|||
|
|
Gunn slides down, shooting some exploding barrels near a soldier and blowing him into the air. Meanwhile a little monorail goes past with a mounted machine gun on it and blasts a Wolf Force guy off his rope. Gunn chucks a grenade into the monorail taking out the machine gunners. The battle rages on with the two sides either side of the room, using the monorail track as cover. Gunn climbs up onto a higher walkway, running around the room. It's extremely exposed, but for some reason nobody shoots at him. He does what is to become a series trademark of kicking down a door and spraying bullets into a room, he finds the plans and components for The Gun, which says "Fault: we don't have a decent machine gun to fit in". He decides the Ripper machine gun is the perfect candidate and sticks on the flamethrower and grenade launcher components, creating The Gun! |
||
|
He 'tests it' by blasting an enemy on the opposite gantry, which he could have done with the Ripper on it's own. Then he uses the grenades to blast open another door, and fires mini-fireballs in to kill a few enemy officers. He finds a woman named Jackson, who was taken hostage by Stealth Force for... no real reason. |
|||
|
Back at the main battle, Stealth Force are getting the upper hand, causing the Wolf Force soldiers become demoralised. Then Gunn shows up and blasts several Stealth Force soldiers with a grenade, before shooting a few more. The Wolf Force guys get inspired to fight on, rather easily winning. Once the battle is over, the Wolf Force survivors get on a big lift, riding back up to the surface. They fly off towards Britain on an SSTO space plane, which is on auto-pilot, but a survivor in the base launches the Nuke! Jackson watched it launch from the window, you can see it reflected in the glass, in a poor attempt at an arty-farty panel. |
|
||
|
Gunn runs to the controls and disables the Auto-pilot, before blasting the Nuke out of the sky in a very Moonraker-like sequence. He flies into London (which has many damaged buildings, but Wolf Force flags everywhere), and lands at an airport. "The commander" congratulates him and says he'll be promoted, for no other reason than explaining why he is a corporal in the next story. Then Gunn asks "Commander, one other thing, how about space training? It wasn't easy up there!" I suppose that's meant to be some badassly-nonchalant dialogue. Not that it matters, because Gunn doesn't go into space again... at least, not in the WW3 stories! |
|||
